If you have a good relationship with your mom – great news! You are practically about to turn into your mother. At least, that’s what science says.
Okay, so it’s not exactly that simple. But a recent study has shown that as women reach around 30 years of age they start to become much more like their mothers.
The head of this cutting-edge research is Dr. Julian De Silva, a plastic surgeon at the Centre of Facial Cosmetic Surgery in the United Kingdom. Recently Dr. De Silva has noticed his patients getting younger. Perplexed, he decided to look into why people want plastic surgery sooner in life.
His findings were incredible. Starting around the age of 30, many women start to become significantly more like their moms.
Dr. De Silva surveyed over 2,000 people, asking them when they started to feel and act like their parents. Questions included when they started consuming the same media, liking the same activities, and using the same colloquial expressions. The study showed that 52% of women started acting like their moms between the ages of 30 and 35. 26% started acting more like their mothers from 35 to 40 years old. Just 10% pushed off the phenomenon until they were 40 or even 50 years old.
What does this mean for you? You will probably start absorbing news from the stations your parents liked, preparing the same family meals, and using the same old expressions you couldn’t stand as a child. Are you horrified yet?
Of course, turning into your mom isn’t all bad. Many of us loved our childhoods! But no matter how good you had it, the thought of becoming exactly like your mom might make you cringe a little.
After all, this is why teenagers rebel. It is why young adults move out of the house. It is why we manage our own lives as we get older. Wanting to be UNLIKE our parents makes so much sense! So why on earth do we ultimately become more like them??
According to Dr. De Silva, this is because you yourself are becoming a parent. Many people become first time parents around the age of 30, so it only makes sense that they adopt the same customs they grew up learning. This adds a level of protection. After all, you turned out alright! If you mimic your parents, your kids will probably do fine, too.
The thought of starting a new family is inspiring. There is, however, a less exciting factor that might motivate you to act more like your mom: you probably look more like her.
As women edge toward the middle of their lives they start to develop wrinkles. Their bodies change, and their tastes change with it. Suddenly wearing an ugly sweater at a holiday party doesn’t seem so bad. And what’s wrong with butterscotch candies, anyway?
After all, since most moms have children around the age of 30, when you reach 30 you look the way your mom did when you first met her. This shapes your expectations of yourself, especially how you will think and act.
The more you look like your mom and take on the same responsibilities as her, the more you become like her. You pick up those little features of her personality that once made you cringe. You become a symbol of responsibility and success, just like your mom.
Dr. De Silva also shares that this process is not unique to women. Many men become similar to their dads around age 34. This, too, is around the time that most men become fathers. Coincidence? We don’t think so!
So you will become like your mom, and your husband will become like his dad. What should you do with this knowledge? Meet each other’s parents! Make sure that you can picture yourself living in a home like that of your in-laws, because that it likely what will make your spouse feel comfortable.
Of course, becoming like your parent isn’t all that bad, but it can make a lot of us feel uneasy. “It is an inevitable part of aging but a process lots of people want to put off for as long as possible,” observes Dr. De Silva. “It is one of the reasons why the average age of first-time cosmetic surgery is coming down for both sexes.”
Start appreciating your parents now, because you are about to notice you are just like them.
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